i so often forget this

I am no longer my own, but Yours.

Use me as You choose;

Rank me alongside whoever you choose;

Put me to doing, put me to suffering;

Let me be employed for You, or laid aside for You,

Raised up for You, or brought low for You;

Let me be full, let me be empty;

Let me have all things, let me have nothing;

With my whole heart I freely choose to yield

All things to your ordering and approval.

So now, God of glory,

Father, Son and Holy Spirit,

You are mine and I am Your own.

-Celtic Daily Prayer

..im so glad things are all ok now

There was that night
you pulled in close
we always wrapped around like twine
and the warmth of your skin
I remember
told me more than you could ever say

we wrapped around like twine
and try as I might it will never leave me
i remember
under those covers
the pull of gravity
so dont let go now
no, dont forget….me

there was that stare
you pulled in close
for that you always had the time
and that child like wonder
I remember
gave me more than i ever had before

the figure of a lady

Last night went to Fletchers with Spencer and Jo to see PE (athenas amazing band,

http://www.myspace.com/playgroundetiquette ) They rocked…as did the other bands…anyways…I was standing with Jo and Spencer at the bar waiting for a salad that Spencer had ordered when Athena came up to me and said:

“oh! its you! Man…from behind you looked like a girl…I was like damn! what a nice little figure!”

I then looked at Jo, then gave Athena a look

“oh no..i mean…i dont mean it in that way!”

lol…mannnnnnnnnnn….though aparently I have a nice ass it turns out…lol….so the whole night found me paranoid some guy would think i was a hot girl from behind.

never get your oil changed at Sears in Eastpoint mall

….so after months and months…perhaps even a year of not getting my oil changed, I decided it was about time I do so. Being in Dundalk, taking care of family stuff, I decided to head over to the Sears at Eastpoint. Now, for those of you who dont know I worked at that horrid mall for 6 and a half years at FYE. Good memories, and great stories, but a God awful mall. It was like the set of a rap video mixed with The Corner, every day. Atleast once day I would chase bad guys because the mall security was less skilled then those in Super Troopers! I digress….back to the point. I went to Sears to get my oil changed, all well and good. The required half hour wait passed and I returned to the dim witted employee who was handling my auto needs. As I approach he is sitting on 2 chairs (he was a man of substancial proportions). He groans, walks up to me and spurts out the following:
“we couldnt change your oil” He then stared at me for 2 minutes, breathing heavily out of his nose.
What struck me first was that this was an acceptable statement, and Im fully convinced he intended to leave it at that, but no, I would not have this.

I replied
“what? why not?”

“your valve cover gauge is leaking”

“what is that? what does that mean? is it serious?” I of course am concerned for the health of my car.

“its a valve cover gauge”

“yes…well..you said that, but I dont know what that is”

He lets out a gasious sigh, as if I am asking too much of him and says: “basically its the gauge for your valve cover, and its leaking”

I looked at him, raised an eyebrow (which is mostly an action done in my head as I cant physically do that) “you just said the same thing in a different order!”

He was about to speak when his co-worker decided to join our fruitful discussion. “its in you engine, it has some black stuff on it. The oil will come out if we put it in, just right out, so you gotta get it fixed”

i pause….”well….if all the oil will come out if you add more, do I currently have oil in my car or did my currently supply fall out as well? Can you show me what you are talking about, and can you fix it?”

the second worker continues…”to be honest, no, I’d not waste the money, just take off the lid (anf you’ll see it because of the black thing) and replace the gauge, then come back to us and we will replace your oil. The rest of your oil is still there.”

This is when I just decided I had to go regardless of the fact that I received no answer to really any question. For instance…how is my oil still there if, when new oil is added, it will leak completely out leaving me with no oil? Do they add holes with their oil or is my currently oil jsut thicker preventing it from leaking? Also, upon checking my engine to locate this area with the black spot I was overwhelmed by the amount of black areas in my engine, and not any closer to discovering this mysterious leaking area. So there ended my wasted hour today at Sears in Eastpoint.

This kids, is why you stay in school!!

Fasinating Rythmn

I was listening to this song and I couldnt help but be reminded of a dear old friend of mine. Someone I dated briefly, but under unfortunate circumstances. I couldnt have possibly provided her with the attention, nor respect she deserved at the time, for my heart was elsewhere, and broken. I would very much like to one day fix things there, as I feel I atleast owe that much to her.

She was the first time I had gotten my mind off of the person who broke my heart, even for a second, and it did feel good…but as any momentary distraction it faded to the pain.

She deserved to be more than a momentary distraction…..had we met under different circumstances….i could have given her that.